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Your Political Career
Why not? Actual qualifications are completely unnecessary. So here’s your plan: whatever you do, don’t tell voters the truth, They hate that. Instead, make up some wild stories and call them the truth. Let your imagination go wild. The bigger and stupider the lie, the better. Making sense will only turn people off.

Tell the stories over and over and over. When they are proven false, deny it. Make up new lies for why the “proofs” are really wild stories and transparent lies.

Be sure your stories have villains who voters already hate and fear. When possible, however, provide new people to hate and new things to fear. Never forgive, never admit that you’ve made a mistake, and always double down.

Now run for office. If you lose, don’t admit it. If you win, do not govern. Just keep telling the wild lies and use them to raise as much money as you possibly can.

Run for re-election, and never look back.

Thank you for your service.
Yes, voting matters. Polls do not.
~ H, Santa Cruz